For Sinthia

[cook_the_rude]

When she follows him, she will find the office upstairs, near the library, in an area of the non-linear rooms section that feels more business-like because of that location; it is small but functional, with clean-lined modernist furniture made of pale wood contrasting with the 19th century prints of poisonous flowers in ornate frames that adorn the walls. There are two comfortable chairs with end-tables, a small book-case, and a pale leather couch. There is a small drawing table with two straight-backed chairs that, at this moment, holds nothing but a flower arrangement made from the cuttings Sinthia gave him. There are two doors, one slightly ajar to reveal a tiny pantry kitchen, the other firmly closed, with a covered lock that clearly labels it a bathroom door, lockable from the inside.

 

There are two floor-length windows obscured by pale, gauzy blinds, at the bottom of which a balcony is visible, and beyond its grate, the lake area, with a view to the stables, the garden, and the forge.

 

A tall carafe of cool water, two glasses, and a box of tissues in a metal holder are set out.

 

"Please take a seat, Sinthia," Dr. Lecter says.

Comments

[cook_the_rude]

"So," Dr. Lecter says. "Your gift. To a friend."

[abyssum_invocat]

"What about it?" she asks. "You said it could be anything. To anyone." She certainly hasn't decided what or who yet, she hasn't even thought about it, to be honest.

[cook_the_rude]

"Start thinking about it," Dr. Lecter says. "And come back next time prepared to tell me how it went."

[abyssum_invocat]

"...Does that mean you want me to leave now?" she asks. "Or...are there other things?"

[cook_the_rude]

"Do you want to talk about anything else?" Dr. Lecter says. "I for one wouldn't want to overload you, especially not at your very first session."

[abyssum_invocat]

"I thought this would be more...fixing me, not...telling me to give someone a gift. I don't know how that's going to help."

[cook_the_rude]

"What did you imagine fixing you would be like?" Hannibal asks.

[abyssum_invocat]

"That you could help me remember things I can't get to," Sinthia answers, slowly with her voice light and soft, as if saying it too loudly would jinx the idea. "And...teach me to pass for normal better. I don't do it very well. I know people think that."

She doesn't emote well in stressful situations, or very noticeably at all sometimes.

[cook_the_rude]

"Yes, that's what we're working on," Hannibal says.

[abyssum_invocat]

"This isn't at all how I thought it would happen."

[cook_the_rude]

"Then what did you hope for? Tell me, Sinthia, what do you feel we should accomplish?"

[abyssum_invocat]

"I don't know," she says, frustrated though the show of emotion is very dim from her. From anyone else it would seem small and peevish. "I don't know how this works, but isn't it supposed to be difficult? Giving someone something isn't ahrd, it's just confusing."

[cook_the_rude]

"Just be with the confusion and report back about the experience," Dr. Lecter smiles. "And no, it's not supposed to be hard, or people wouldn't do it. Therapy needs to be less hard than whatever problems drive the patients to it, or they wouldn't go through with it."

[abyssum_invocat]

"It is less hard," she says softly. "But that doesn't mean it's easy."

It isn't; even the questions that surround giving a gift aren't. But she's trying.

[cook_the_rude]

"It's a different kind of hard, maybe?" Dr. Lecter suggests.

[abyssum_invocat]

"It's....I don't know how to classify it," she says after a moment. "This--doing something without questioning why--is easy. But thinking about the why...I don't usually do that. It's very strange."

[cook_the_rude]

Hannibal is giving her a long look, saying nothing.

[abyssum_invocat]

"What?" she asks after an inscrutable minute-long stare.

[cook_the_rude]

"You do realise you are already in the process?" Dr. Lecter says.

[abyssum_invocat]

"Of course. But that doesn't mean the process is irreversible," she says lightly. "Does it?"

[cook_the_rude]

"It doesn't, and it's not the issue," Dr. Lecter says. "You have engaged with therapy already. That is the main point here."